throwback thursday :: crossroads

photo via weheartit

Danielle over at Sometimes Sweet has begun her journal prompts again! Really excited about this project because it kind of forces you to take a second look at your life, whether it's past or present. More than anything, I like being able to reflect on memories.

Here's today's journal: 

Everyone has a time in their life they view as a crossroad. Sometimes you can see it as it's happening, and you're able to choose one way or another. Other times you may not realize you're there until you look back, and see what a turning point it really was. This week, write about a time you view as a marker in your life; a distinct place where things changed, for better or worse. 

I'm sure a lot of people will say this, but college was a huge turning point in my life. I feel like I didn't even know myself until I went through the experiences that I did there. It's the most distinct place I can think of for change in my life. I learned how to be independent at college. I made friends that are still my lifelong sisters and brothers. I figured out how to trust God but not be the kind of Christian that non-believers hate. I had my heart broken. I had so much fun it was sick. I taught myself how to play guitar. I started writing and recording music. I learned how to get past things that happened to me at home now that I didn't have to be there. People changed my life, and I changed theirs.

If I had to pick a specific time I was at a crossroad, I would say it was when I made an active choice to not be a pushover. That sounds kind of stupid on paper. But a lot of people know me today as someone strong-willed and very confident, I voice my opinions and won't take crap from anyone. That is not who I used to be. I used to be someone who was over-emotional and did things to please people. I never used to question the real situation when someone made me upset or got mad at me. I always assumed it was my fault. I look back on college and think of many times where I wish I could have had a thicker skin and stood up for myself. Even right after college, I wish I could have done that. But I am glad I chose at a certain point (albeit later) to go down a road that made me a stronger person. I am glad I finally allowed myself to feel and present myself in the way that I know I should have all along.